Confidential: The Stuff That Executive Assistants Know... and Keep

Providing personal assistance and administrative support to CEOs, Presidents and Vice Presidents are only a part of what we do. It also comes with the job, that we are privy to sensitive information, and sometimes even be the first to know about it. Err.... whether we like it or not. To see things that the rest of the company does not or are not allowed to see. To know things that we don't care to know about... (Spare us!) As Executive Assistants, we are gatekeepers of these secrets. 

Your view up there, sitting beside the top honchos - is total. You might think it's cool, sometimes it is, often it's not. It can be a burden. There are some facts that we're better off not knowing, so we can keep our illusions and go on with our happy life. It's okay if the view is always roses and butterflies - but sometimes, it can be dead bodies being buried. (Only a metaphor, dearies)

If you have a problem keeping secrets, if you're a tattletale, if you like being the center of attention with your juicy stories - you can be a very dangerous EA, indeed. Small talk from you can get people in trouble... even the company itself. Whenever a top executive is involved in a legal case, did you know that their EAs are oftentimes subpoenaed for their statement? We're a treasure trove of information. Many know this, and use friendship to gain access to what we know. (Some don't know it and deny us access to information, which I think is really funny.)

So... if you're in this job, you have to be conscious of this fact all the time. You know things that other people would love to be privy to. You have super cool and often not so cool knowledge, whether you're aware of it or not - but... they're confidential. Keep your mouth shut.

Friendships in the Office

Because of this, it is not advisable to develop close friendships in the office - unless it's with fellow EAs or your bosses - people with the same level of security clearance as you. Why is that necessary? Well, what are you going to talk about with friends, if not your work? At times when you're angry with your boss, who will you vent it out to... and what would you say? Do you see the danger there?

For this reason, I often come off as snobby or aloof to my colleagues. I have to watch my words all the time. Why bother? I keep my interactions short and only when necessary. It's the price to pay for this "privilege". But if you can separate your work and not talk about it even to your friends - then go ahead. But honestly, I doubt it.

"The more secrets you keep... 

the less opportunity you have for real intimacy"

We're just too close to the powers that be, to be careless and nonchalant about what's inside our heads. I knew an EA who used what she knew to gain friends in the office. Her intro was always, "Hey let's have coffee... I have something to tell you..." And people made friends with her. Who doesn't love a good story? Well, her career as an EA didn't end well... and that's all I'm gonna say about that. 

If you're an EA, please proceed.

When Information Goes Against Your Morals

Like I mentioned, not everything you see will be admirable and inspiring. It's big business. Sometimes, there are dead bodies lying around. What do you do when you have information that goes against your principles or morals? It can be anything from corruption in the workplace, to decision  making, to indiscretions... What do you do with that?

I've been told by some that idealism and big business are not good bedmates. That's true. You have to be thick-skinned in this job. If you're a delicate flower, please, spare yourself the heartache and move on to something else. Big business can be cruel and heartless - yet it can also be inspiring and motivating. You have to be able to accept this balance. You're not working for a charity. We're talking about money and profits - and oftentimes, business decisions need to be made.

But if it's about Corruption or Indiscretions... I suggest you talk to your boss about it. What if it's your boss who's corrupt or indiscreet? I leave that decision up to you. Only you can put a limit to what you can and cannot accept. If it's too much for you to swallow and you lose the pride you once felt as an EA - start looking for other places to work for. A good EA can find a job easily.

Should you report it and take action? Again, weigh your decisions. Be smart. If the issue is corruption, you don't know how high up it goes. Your effort might be useless. You don't want to risk your career for nothing, right? If you plan to stay in the industry, I suggest you just leave quietly with your newly gained wisdom. But... if you really feel that it should be stopped, and that you must report it... that is certainly your prerogative. Be prepared for whiplash in one form or another.  However noble and right, it is a career debilitating move.

How to Avoid Spilling the Beans and Maintain Confidentiality

• Always be conscious of the words that are coming out of your mouth. You don't want to accidentally mention something you shouldn't.
• Keep your friendships confined to people who have the same or higher access as you.
• You know the saying that if you're going to gripe, gripe UP? Never air grievances carelessly and certainly not to your direct reports or acquaintances.
• Be aware that some people try to get close to you only to know what you know. It's not paranoia, it's fact. Doesn't apply to everyone, but to most.
  
  
  There was a high level executive who chatted with me all the time when I was the EA to a President. Boy, was he friendly. When my President left, so did his friendship. Even though I'm not surprised, it still makes me shake my head in disappointment and I feel just a wee bit angry for being used. But, that's just the way it is. It's called politics. It's not only restricted to lower level employees, but applies to everyone who thinks you're good for something. It's an ugly fact that people will suck up to you, only because of your access. Be aware of it and deal with it.

This is a part of our job that is not mentioned in our JD...
We are the gatekeepers. Unless you're a keymaster, your access to these secrets is DENIED.